The Procession to Calvary
Submitted by: David K.
Complete Walkthrough Guide:
Written by Joe Richardson
A guide to completing The Procession to Calvary (murder-free).
-=Before You Begin=-
To succeed in your task of bringing Heavenly Peter to justice, you must
without doing any murders. If at any point you do kill someone, word of
will spread quickly, townspeople will stop offering you their support, and
way forward will be to continue killing anyone who stands in your
-=Leaving the North=-
* Pick up the scissors from the hanging corpse to the left of the
* Talk to Immortal John, ask him about murders until he gives you your
* Talk to each of the invalids outside the field hospital.
* Go back and pick up the socks from the nude men on the shore.
* Give the scissors to Invalid 1.
* Pat Invalid 2 on the head.
* Give the socks to Invalid 3.
* Ask the cripple for his crutches.
* Give the crutches to the boatman.
* Cut the rope with your sword (right click to draw your sword).
* Follow the path up the hill to the left of the scene.
* Use your sword on the Suspiciously Hotspot-y Post to the left of the
* Pick up the wheel.
* Follow the path to the distant hill.
* Ask the bowman if he’s ever going to shoot the dang apple.
* Pick up the apple.
* Return to the donkey lady and give her the apple and the wheel.
-=Get to the Basilica=-
* Talk to boatman, ask if he can take you to the church.
* Talk to magician, ask about his tricks, then ask if he will teach you to
walk on water.
* Exit back through the town gate and take the right path over the bridge,
to the graveyard.
* Pick some berries.
* Go back and give the berries to the magician.
* Give the boat pass to the boatman.
-=Find Bribe #1 (Necklace)=-
* Enter the theatre (the door in the bottom-right corner of the main town square).
* Ask the tall lady about the talent show and how the winner is
* Return to the town square and enter the door closest to the
* Talk to the dressmakers, ask them to make you a dress.
* Talk to the composer, ask for a song.
* Examine the music – this will show you the correct order to sing the
words in later.
* Continue to the far left of the scene and jump in water.
* Quickly – Stab fish with your sword before it flops off.
* Pick up the fish.
* Return to the dressmakers to pick up your dress.
* Return to the theatre, ask to enter the talent contest.
* Sing the word in the correct order (lines 1, 3, 2, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4).
-=Find Bribe #2 (Boy)=-
* Enter the door behind the empty tables in the town square, then take the
door on the left.
* Ask the snuff sniffer for a bump of snuff.
* Go back to the crucifixion scene and talk to the magician.
* Retrieve the bones from the graveyard.
* Give the snuff to the ‘metrognome’ in the torture scene.
* Pick up the pliers.
* Give the pliers and bones to the magician.
* Return to the graveyard, talk to the man in the cave.
* Tell him to push from his side, then push as the rock shakes.
* Enter the cave and pick up the boy.
-=Find Bribe #3 (Crown)=-
* Pick up the lamb from the altar.
* Give the lamb to the (not so) dead guy in the graveyard in exchange for
* Go to the library
(the door behind the empty tables
in the town square, then the door on the right).
* Give the book to the library.
-=Find Bribe #4 (Brooch)=-
* Return to the corridor, then enter the door on the left.
* Talk to the man sniffing snuff in the middle of the room.
* Ask about the treasure map until he gives you a treasure map.
* Examine the map, this shows you where to find the treasure.
* Enter the gallery (the second door from the left in the town
* Examine the painting that looks like the map (to the left of the door to
the back room).
* Click on the spot marked by the X on the map to reveal the safe.
* Return to the cave and take some bugs from the barrel.
* Give the bugs to the skunk in the crucifixion scene.
* Let the skunk follow you back the where you got the treasure map.
* Give the skunk a poke to release it’s gas and trigger the opening of the
* Walk around to the other side of the window, then pick up the key.
* Return to the safe in the gallery and use the key to open it.
-=Fix the Brooch=-
* Return to the cave and enter the back room.
* Talk to the bird-man about pearls and riddles.
* The solution to the riddle is found within the paintings in the gallery
* Take a severed head from the woman in the crucifixion scene.
* Put the head in the barrel full of bugs in the cave.
* Take the head back out of the barrel, half consumed.
* Repeat this process one more time to get the skull.
* Put the skull on the altar, then tell the bird-man you have made a
* Pick up your pearl.
* Give this to the girl with the amethyst earring
(the door behind the empty tables
in the town square).
* Combine the amethyst and the brooch.
* Give your bribes to the bishops.
* Kill Peter.
There are two alternate endings. To reach the first, follow the steps above
until you meet
Heavenly Peter, then talk to him instead of murdering him. Accept his offer
of great riches.
Two reach the second alternate ending, simply murder someone (or everyone
who stands in
your way) before reaching Heavenly Peter…